I don't usually post a whole lot here to begin with, but you may not hear or see much of me for a little while, unless you know me in person. Unfortunately, today, a mere 20 minutes after I arrived home from work, my dog passed away after having two seizures. He had been sent to intensive care to try and recover his failing kidneys, but we think the stress of not being around his family was too great for him and he was unable to handle it. (All they gave him was fluids.) My parents said he'd been acting strange after he came home this afternoon, he'd been trying to find places to hide, following my mom closely (as if dependent upon her), and wouldn't sit still, eat, or drink. My other dog seemed to sense something was wrong, and she would check on him, then keep her distance, which was also unusual behavior from her.
The last two days I didn't get to spend much time with him, he was fine on Thursday, and my dad hadn't woken me up to tell me he was taking Buddy in, so the last time I saw him he was asleep on my bed, coming in to see him laying on a mat after having a seizure was probably the worst thing, and I sat with him, went downstairs to change after a lot of prompting from my mother, and by the time I came upstairs, he had stopped breathing.
So no, I will likely not respond to a lot of things for a while, nor will I be very productive in school for the next few weeks. I'll see if there's anything I'm able to accomplish, if at all, otherwise, my week prior to this had already been filled with anxiety and depression, and now I just feel broken and numb and need to recover. My dear Buddy was the major go-to for when I hit my extreme low points in my depression cycles and would let me cling to him if I was anxious. Without him, it's going to be extremely hard to try and get better, but he wouldn't want me to give up, so I'll try to keep his smiling face in mind if I need it for motivation.
I also am going to apologize in advance to my dear partner, because I may become somewhat emotionally dependent upon them for a little while during my recovery. My other dog has done a good job so far of stepping up to help us in Buddy's place, but we'll see what happens from here.
Hopefully, I won't take too long to recover, and if I do take longer than anticipated, hopefully I can still manage to do schoolwork and not break down at work. Here's hoping for the best.